MIA

Well, yeah...its been a bit since I was last on here. :/ Since the last time I blogged...I did the Follistim injections, then had my IUI's on the 12th and 13th of November. I began Progesterone on the 15th, just as a precautionary measure and I went to the office on the 23rd of November for my blood HCG. I waited a long almost 3 hours for a phone call, they were closing at noon because it was the day before Thanksgiving, and so at 11:55 I couldn't wait any longer and I called them...I got a BFN! I was devestated to say the least. I felt like such a failure and just lost. The very next day, Thanksgiving, AF came and it was like a second punch in the gut. I had BC pills left from my last cycle, so I began taking them that night. I have an appt scheduled for 12/19 to go in for my suppression U/S and get ready to do the shots again. Probably we'll be doing IUI's on 1/7 or 8th.

So I've just been trying to keep busy and keep my mind on other things. Its hard and it sucks. For the last two weeks on FB, it seems like EVERY one is annoucing pregnancies! I am happy for people and don't begrudge them but I am very jealous and it makes me sad. I just don't understand why it has to be so difficult. :(

Tonight after dinner we took Haylei to see the Christmas lights at Rhema! She loved it, but not quite as much as the Christmas kingdom at the Castle in Muskogee...they have TONS of inflatables and you drive through them.

I'm going to try to do better at blogging again, because I want to have this later on to look back and remember the way I felt and what steps we took to get to were we want to go.